Prior to your 15 month check-up, we had only used our "firm" voices to deter bad behavior. That was it. We would repeat ourselves over and over and over again.
Lucy, no.
No, Lucy, that's not a toy.
Lucy...I said stop.
Until I'd finally snap and yell, Lucy, I said NO!!! (Mother of the Year, I know...)
Dr. P suggested the use of 1-2-3 Magic, time-out, and a (gentle) tap on the mouth for biting. Not having read 1-2-3 Magic, I can only reiterate the concept that Dr. P shared with us:
You are given three chances to stop the bad behavior before there are consequences. Using our "firm" voices, we say why the behavior is wrong and that it's the first/second/third warning. After the third warning, if you persist, the activity is over. We remove you from the room and redirect your attention.
1-2-3 Magic is meant for children ages 2-12 years, and uses time-out as a consequence for all bad behaviors; but we've reserved time-outs for biting only. (I think Lu has had two total...) And we decided that the tap on the mouth wasn't for us. We primarily try to anticipate and avoid situations that we know will provoke bad behavior, but when that's not possible, we ultimately have to remove and redirect. Even though that occasionally means enduring a tantrum... But I can
I'd love to hear from other moms on the subject. What methods are you using (or planning to use) to discipline your kiddos?
Thankfully we haven't had to deal with this yet, but I was recently looking at the Love and Logic book and really think I will be taking that route.
ReplyDeleteMy 13 month old is biting a lot too! And the crazy thing is, when I firmly say NO biting Matthew, he smiles and giggles and thinks it's funny and a game...ugh! Luckily I was given that 1-2-3 Magic book yrs old w/ one of my older children, I'll have to dust it off and give it a read. He's been hitting and biting and thinks it's funny and a game...so I don't have any suggestions because I was just going to to try to research some solutions myself. I also put a teether in the freezer and had him bite on that, because I thought maybe he has more teeth coming in.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if it's true but when I talked my doctor she said lots of kids bite when molars are coming in. She said to try to redirect and do similar to the 123 magic ... I'm looking for discipline stratifies as well , I guess I better do some research
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