My beef with daycare.

Let me preface by saying that I know no one else can take care of my kid like I can.  I get that. 

I also want to clarify that I am not anti-daycare.  I used to be.  Cost, germs, and "ouch reports" aside, I am well aware of the benefits that are to be had from a daycare center. 

My beef is with OUR daycare center.  My beef is that the fundamental needs of my child are not being met consistently.

(Ok, I think I'm done using the word beef.)

Beef.  Beef.  BEEF.

(Ok, seriously, I'm done now.)

I have let a lot of shit slide in the last 7-8 months, but I'm done.  WE ARE DONE.  One more week, at most, and then we will NEVER use this center again.  Let me tell you why...

• Lucy needs to be changed more than 3 times in a 9-hour period.  7 HOURS in the same diaper is not acceptable.
• Lucy needs to eat.  I pack her breakfast, lunch and two snacks everyday, and everyday you send home the leftovers.  I cannot tell you the number of times her food has come back completely untouched, as if it hadn't been offered to her at all.  Three times this week alone!  I do not pack these items as a suggestion.
• Yogurt.  It's her afternoon snack.  It has been for months.  Do not take it upon yourself to create strange concoctions with the contents of her lunchbox.  Do not discard the other breakfast items I have packed because the yogurt is easier to serve.
• DO NOT LIE TO ME.  Do not tell me that the other teacher misspoke and that the daily report was inaccurate.  The proof is in the poop:  you fed my kid peanut butter and apples.  She is allergic to peanut butter.  Rather than lie, and discredit the two sources that I rely on for daily feedback, apologize and ensure that it does not happen again.
• Your daily report sucks.  It is vague, and apparently unreliable per the peanut butter incident. 
• We're supposed to be paying the toddler rate, not the infant rate.  We were told at enrollment that the price would change when she changed rooms.  YOU changed her room, but YOU did not and will not change her rate until her second birthday.  WTF??   
• Lucy has a hell of a lot of accidents on your watch. 'Nuff said.

I have tried speaking with the directors and teachers; they act surprised and apologetic, but nothing ever changes.  One of the teachers actually asked if she could give our name and number as a reference for new clients...  Haha.  You had better hope we never get called!

Viral Chest Infection

Well, crap.  I guess it's my fault for bragging about your good health in the last few monthly birthday posts...because now you (and the rest of daycare) have come down with a nasty bug.  (And passed it on to mom and dad!) 

You have this gross, wet cough that keeps you from falling asleep; your nose is full of junk; and, you're downright whiny and uncomfy most of the time.   

We finally decided to visit the pediatrician yesterday, because we worried it was Whooping Cough or Strep; but, much to our surprise, the doctor said your chest was clear and recommended plain ol' Robitussin.  (It's still strange to me to give you over-the-counter meds.)  Fortunately, the dosage is small, and it's brought you some relief.  Hopefully it'll blow over soon, because we're ready for the next healthy streak.

One nap isn't cutting it.

From what I gather, a lot of kids transition to one nap after their first birthday.  (Not that they HAVE to, according to this sleep chart.)  Lucy isn't one of those kids.  That girl needs her two naps, or she turns into a major fuss pot. 

Her schedule has been a little unpredictable the past two months...  Most days she takes two 1-1.5 hour naps, around 10:00 am and 2:00 pm; but there were some days that she would take one short morning nap (30-45 minutes) and one longer afternoon nap (1.5 hours), or only one looong nap (2-3 hours) in the middle of the day.  Then, a couple weeks ago, she changed classrooms* at school. 

Lucy's teachers felt that she was ready and would be happier playing with the older kids in the Trainer Room (18 months to 3 years).  Casey and I felt relatively comfortable with the idea, except for one detail:  Trainers only take one, scheduled nap per day. 

My poor, sleepy peanut...
Can't even keep her head up at the dinner table!

I'm sure most of my readers are rolling their eyes right about now, and thinking, "She'll adjust" or "She'll get over it".  And that may be true, evenutally, but, for the time being, my poor Goose is really missing her second nap.  And I miss my happy, well-rested girl! 

There is a noticeable difference in her disposition on the days she goes to daycare; she's whiny and clingy, impatient, and uninterested in eating her dinner.  There have even been times that she's fallen asleep on the car ride home from daycare...and we literally live across the street from the center!  That's how tired she is!!  I understand why daycare has to do this, but that doesn't mean I like it.  And you better believe when Lulu is at home, she gets her two naps!    

*Our daycare is the only center I've seen that does not have a One Year Old Room; instead it has an extended age range in the Infant Room (8 weeks to 18 months).

Daycare Report 7/5/12

Oh I'm sorry, Morning Teacher, should I not have been encouraging Lucy to bite others??

/dies 

Lucy's First Day of "School"

If you had told me two months ago that Lucy would be starting daycare today, I would've thought the world was ending.  I would've cried; I would've worried; I would've been overly critical; I would've (tried to) quit my job.  Two months ago, I wouldn't have allowed it.

But today I stand before my readers proudly, and say, Meh, things could be worse.

We got very lucky, as daycare options were not abundant within our price range, and found a clean, quality daycare that is close to our home.  The teachers are friendly and accomodating; the ratios are low; they allow for flexible schedules; and, a huge bonus:  they're Pro-Cloth!  We felt very comfortable from the moment we walked into the center; and Lucy had so much fun checking out all the toys playing with the other babies during our interview. 

I feel good about this.  It's not my first choice, but it's the most practical choice.  I know she'll have fun.  I know she'll learn.  And I know she'll get sick.  (Taking the good with the bad, right?)

So, as of 6:30 this morning, we're officially a Daycare Family...at least for two days a week.

She didn't cry once! 

Lucy Duty Update

I've been getting a lot of questions about my job status lately; which seemed weird to me at first, but then I realized that I kinda left everybody hanging. 

I am not a stay at home mom.  I am still working full-time, and hope to do so for as long as possible.  Wait, what? 

So what are we doing about childcare (a.k.a. "Lucy Duty")? 

The answer is not so simple.  It has taken a lot of effort to keep our little Goose out of daycare, a family-wide effort.  Grampy and Auntie Fallon watched Lucy from 7 am - 3 pm from June to October, until my Dad's accident.  We (Casey, myself, and my Mom) were able to use Vacation, Work from Home, Sick, and Unpaid Time for the month immediately following.  And presently, Uncle Cole has taken over the bulk of Lucy Duty.  He watches her from 7 am - 1 pm, and then Auntie Fallon watches Lulu until 3 pm.  My Mom and I both try to take one day off each week, to cut down the week for Uncle Cole and Auntie Fallon. 

I told you the answer was pretty messy.  I'll wait for you to catch your breath.

We're hoping to stick with this plan until next May, when Fallon graduates.  (Am hoping to successfully bribe her with money and designer handbags so that she'll take over Lucy Duty.)  Believe me when I say that we know how much we are asking of them; this is not the arrangement we discussed when I was pregnant...  Unfortunately, no one could've forseen Grampy's accident.  And if one day it gets to be too much for Uncle Cole or Auntie Fallon, Casey and I won't have much of a choice in the matter.          

Now to answer the two lingering questions...

Why are we so gosh darn opposed to daycare?  The cost.  The quality of care (holy moly, the horror stories I have heard and read!).  My phobia of germs and strangers.  My brief stint as a nanny that scarred me for life!

Why do I hope to continue working?  I've kept it no secret that I would love to be a SAHM.  Aside from how much I miss Lulu, I feel horribley guilty for imposing on my parents and siblings; but truthfully, we are not financially ready to be a single-income family.  We were recently given the tools to plan and attack our financial goals, and we are finally capable and excited to do so.  (Thanks again, Becky!!!)  By working hard for the next 6 or 12 months, or even through a second pregnancy, we could possibly be ready to make that life-changing decision.

(And just to be excruciatingly clear, I do not judge any parent that puts their child in daycare.  There are certainly many developmental benefits that daycare provides, it's just not an option for our family at this time.)

(Guest Blogger: Meghan) A Healthy Competition

Today's guest post comes from Meg over at Phase Three of Life.  Meg is a good friend of mine and a fellow new momma.  I like to stop by her blog on the daily for a chuckle and to stare at my future son-in-law.  I encourage all of my lovely readers to do the same!  (the chuckling, not the staring)


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I'm not a very competitive person. In fact, I sort of shy away from competition.

All those stories about soccer moms/dads who lose their minds over whether their kid's team was scoring enough or playing adequate defense? Yeah, so not me. I'd be the one on the sidelines with a cooler full of beer, relaxing in my lawn chair, enjoying the nice day.

What? You can't bring beer to your kid's soccer game? What is happening to America??

But then one day last week, Mike came home with a challenge. He'd picked Ryan up from daycare, and the teachers had pointed out the door to his "classroom." It had been decorated with white paper plates that had little red and blue baby footprints stamped all over them. Each classroom had decorated their door in July 4th patriotic fashion.

Aw, that's nice.

Oh, but it's not just nice. It's a competition. You see, photos of each door had been uploaded to the daycare's Facebook page. The classroom with the most votes was going to win a "special prize."

I immediately flew onto Facebook, liked the page and liked my kid's door.

Then I commented with a "Let's do this!"

Our door - the Infant "Pods" - already had about 35 votes and was just a handful of votes behind Classroom #9: The Preschoolers. Each of the other doors only had a few votes each, so it became clear pretty quickly that the Infant Pods and Classroom #9 were going to battle it out.

I fired off a Facebook message to 35 of my closest family and friends.

Then I sat and watched as the first few votes started to roll in. As the day went on, we surpassed Classroom #9 and slowly began to distance ourselves.

They attempted to rally, bringing in several new votes. I strategized with Mike, telling him to hold off voting so that we could use him as a last-minute tie-breaker, if needed.

But my friends and their Facebook addictions proved too powerful for those Preschoolers. The Infant Pods prevailed, with a crushing final score of 74-65!

As you might imagine, the babies were beside themselves with excitement and pride. And Ms. Jen happily reported to Mike that they won an ice cream party!

I won?  Really?

Wait. Can a 9-month-old even eat ice cream?

I think I got too into it.

Lucy is not a fan of daycare.

Granted its only been two days...

We are very fortunate to live in the same town as Goosey's grandparents (on both sides), and we are especially lucky because my dad is retired.  He and my sister watch Lucy during the day, from 7:00-3:00.  Not only is it a HUGE money saver, but it is also a huge comfort to know she is with family.

This transition certainly could have been smoother - traveling the last week of maternity leave was not the brightest idea.  Before yesterday morning, Lucy had only stayed with my parents a handful of times, and only for a few hours at a time.  And on top of that, we really hadn't perfected bottle feeding (I know, I know...I owe you guys a post on introducing the bottle, and I promise its coming).

Auntie Fallon said she was actually starting to get a little worried at one point yesterday, when she couldn't calm Lucy.  Because Lucy is a bit of a nipple snob, she only ate about two ounces between 7 and 3 ( she should have eaten about twelve ounces...).  She spent the majority of her time awake crying - thankfully she slept a lot.  When Lucy gets really, REALLY upset, she coughs from crying so hard....tears stream down...and her eyes get really red.  It is heartbreaking, to say the least.

I basically dropped her off with a bag of different bottles and nipples for them to experiment with; towards the end of the day they discovered that she would tolerate the Medela brand nipples.  This discovery is what made today's experience MUCH better than yesterday; today she ate five ounces - not great, but an improvement.  She still cried a lot - she was fussy almost the whole time she was awake - but she wasn't hysterical. 

We are all praying that she will adjust over time, the sooner the better!  I feel like I am causing her pain, because I left her.  And there is nothing I can do about it until our budget allows for me to stay home.  In the meantime I've applied for the Flex Time schedule at work; once approved I'll be working 7-3:30, instead of 8-4:30.  Its a start, but still not enough. 

And now, I shall leave you with a pic of Goosey taking the bottle like a champ:

YAY Goose!